As children, our parents would often chide us not to be in a rush to grow up and most often in our naivety and romanticized idealization of adulthood, we would pay no heed

The evolution of society has seen a significant shift in the expectation of the reality of the different chronological phases of life.

Along with the evolution of society, there needs to be a shift in the expectation of the reality of the different chronological phases of life. While the evolution of society provides us with an environment that has a kaleidoscope of opportunity, that itself brings with it instability and the problem of too much choice. We, as a society, have been unforgiving with our expectations of the youth in managing these changes. We forget that the world has almost completely changed in the last five years but our expectations and ideals have somewhere remained stagnant. It is no wonder that more and more individuals in their twenties are experiencing what popular culture has termed a “quarter-life crisis.” When the fairytale narrated has always been that in your twenties you finally have it all figured out, it is not surprising that come this age and you have not everything figured out or you feel unsatisfied or unfulfilled and you begin to panic.

As children, our parents would often chide us not to be in a rush to grow up and most often in our naivety and romanticized idealization of adulthood, we would pay no heed. This very concept comes full circle in young adulthood where the majority of individuals feel ill-equipped to take on the perils of adulthood and feel far from where they thought they would be romantically, financially or emotionally.

The Guardian reports that quarter-life crises affect 86 percent of millennials, so the good news is that if you are now relating to the Britney Spears Crossroads movie or the Avril Lavine song Complicated, you are not alone.

Why is it that twenty-five brings with it such pressure, judgment, self -loathing, and self-doubt? What is it about this age that is leading more and more young people to have existential crises and feeling completely frazzled?

Expectation versus Reality in context of the Indian culture: Let’s face it - to our parents, we will always be children, and while majority of individuals in their mid-twenties have had a taste of some form of independence, the truth within the Indian culture is that independence is a concept with a very different definition. Given the current economic climate and social structure at twenty-five, you are most likely to be living at home and just about making enough money to cover a meager contribution to household expenses and everyday living. Let’s face it - this is not the fabulous and exciting life Bollywood and Hollywood led you to believe you would have.

Biological changes:  You can feel your body change, hangovers are now a whole day affair, your metabolism decides that it renegotiate its contract and all of sudden your ability to be active is reduced.

Changes with peer group and other relationships:  It all starts with one person getting engaged and floodgates open to all the feels and changes you were not expecting. Casual romantic relationships suddenly become possible serious life long partnerships, late night drives with friends are swapped for a post-work drink and bitching sessions. People move to different cities for work, and it changes.

The truth is that no one at any age has their life completely figured out. Majority of us will always have something we need to work on or are trying to figure out. Perhaps, if we were honest and told children that life is unpredictable and that we will always struggle in some capacity, it would be too de-motivating. You aren’t supposed to have everything figured out but you are supposed to continuously strive towards being your best self. Perhaps, if we used this narrative from the start it would be healthier and we would be mentally healthier as a society.

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